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May 11, 2008

Greg Millen—worse than useless

Derian Hatcher makes a perfectly good defensive play on Evgeni Malkin. Gets right in his face, stops him cold. Ludicrous penalty call (assuming CBC viewers were shown the actual infraction) ensues. Faced with replay of perfectly good defensive play, CBC analyst/fabulist Greg Millen adopts patented "Can't do that in the new NHL!" smug-man voice and declares it a dead-obvious holding penalty. Which it isn't, and not just in the way I have already argued. It is in fact a hooking penalty—perhaps one of the craziest hooking penalties ever called in the history of this fine sport, again assuming CBC actually showed us the real infraction, but never mind that. Both the CBC's graphic and the PA announcer at Mellonville Arena (as I like to call it) helpfully inform Millen of this fact—the fact that it is a hooking penalty, not a holding penalty. No matter. Three minutes later, the replay runs again, and it's still a hold in Millen's unbearably smug little universe. Never mind the fact that it wasn't. It was a hook. And it wasn't one of those either.

Posted by Chris Selley at May 11, 2008 09:28 PM

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"Worse than useless" is an understatement for the man. I still remember during the Oilers-Sharks series a couple of years ago on a replay of a Patrick Marleau giveaway behind his own net that led to a Fernando Pisani goal, while watching the behind-the-net cam that showed in giant block letters "Marleau" and his jersey number 12, Millen nevertheless referred to him as "Hannan" no less than five times in a 40-second stretch.

I can't wait for this digital age when I can choose whether to have the commentators on my sound or not. Give me crowd noise, give me in-game sounds, let me turn on the commentary if something confusing is going on, but please let me just watch the game without Greg Millen or Glenn Healy or some other tiresome ex-goalie butting in every 5 seconds.

Posted by: Par at May 11, 2008 09:45 PM